Thursday, November 24, 2011

Thankful...











I am ever thankful on this day for...
-My body which is healthy and strong and allows me to enjoy this beautiful life.
-My two ladies who bring me smiles and inspire me with their words and creativity.
-Food!  Having enough, being able to spend time feeding those I love, and knowing where it came from.
-Music.  It inspires, it comforts, it is a gift...thanks to all who share their talents.
-Farmers who provide healthy, responsibly farmed foods for my family to flourish and enjoy.
-My home that I am ever thankful to have.  The security and warmth it provides us all.  Sanctuary.
-Water, being able to share the love of it with those I love, being fortunate enough to be on it in some way.
-My Irishman. He nourishes me and lifts me up.  His talent and artistry astound me and how he captures
  our little place in this world and this life we are making.
-Books.  Sharing this love with my family is a gift.
-Kindness of strangers.  Every now and then people show you that there is good in the world still.  This
  year that came in the form of apples.
-Laughter and giggles.  Silliness and the lightness that brings is the ultimate blessing.  There is nothing
  more beautiful than the sound of a fit of giggles!!!! 

May you all have a day full of those things that make you grateful and never forget how amazing life really is!

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Heartaches

My heart aches.  Please don't ask why.  I still haven't sorted it all out to know why and how.  Given the big life stories being lived and survived around me, I have no room for the blues.  Yet here they still are.  And my heart feels like it is cracking.  Who am I kidding breaking completely in two...  My hand still cramps from the journalling, my phone is filling with sad songs (making me seem like a mooning teenager not a grown woman), my want to walk far and fast is back (weather not cooperating with me on this one), candles have been lit and relit, prayers have been said, meditation has been avoided, junk food has been consumed, alcohol has been purchased for drowning if need be...just truly unsure how to let it go when I am not sure why it is there.  What do I need to learn???  What do I need to see?  Why am I here?  I am out of wit.  I am out of sarcastic asides. I am quite a bit lost.  

Monday, November 21, 2011

Shadows around our home







                                 I am in love with the way light plays and shadows dance in our home. 

Monday, November 7, 2011

Calm before the storm...

Had a really relaxed lovely day today.  Taking advantage of the gorgeous weather to try and capture some of what is left of fall, I at least got to crunch in some leaves.  Went with a cute Irish boy to lunch that included dessert.  Pottered around my house trying to reclaim it, this is a verrrrrryyyyy sloooooowwww process and may never be completed while I in fact live here.  I will be heading off for a concert this evening.

Yet I feel like I am holding my breath...like there is something bad coming and I have to keep walking toward it to in fact get past it.  I do not want to.  I want to dig in my heels and say "I don't wanna"  "You can't make me"  but fact is that isn't going to work.  It is just going to keep lurking around teasing me and hitting me at odd moments in small ways until I look it in the eyes and say go for it...hit me!  When it does it will hurt.  I am sure I will in fact cry.  My heart will crack a bit...but then there will be breathing and band aids and light.  And after I stagger for a small bit, I will keep walking hopefully wiser and better but till then I am bracing...waiting for it...  Calm before the storm...then calm again I hope...